Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Torn between Two Lovers

My good friend who works in the Singapore has fallen in love with a Singaporean guy whom he describes as just the type of guy he had yearned for. So what's the problem? He has a boyfriend here in KL who he has been cohabiting for the past 4 years. The Singaporean is fully aware of his relationship with his boyfriend right from the start. My friend says he still loves his boyfriend but his heart also palpitate for the Singaporean. Truth is he is in love with both of them!

He decides to go with the Singaporean while he is there working and he would not break up with his boyfriend whom he sees when he is back for the weekend. He seems happy doing the stuff he did with the Singaporean but he also feels at home with his boyfriend whenever he is back here in KL. While the Singaporean provides the company that he seeks, my friend feels the comfort of home when he is back here during the weekend.

Yes, there are some problems between his boyfriend and him and the Singaporean is almost everything he had wished for. Does he want to choose between them? Right now, I believe he just wants to enjoy it and let things flow.

Is it possible to be in love with two person at the same time? Some would scoff at that and says that's cheating. What say you?

Amare et sapere vix deo conceditur.


  1. When the song "Torn Between Two Lovers" starts to take on real meaning, he has probably reached a crossroads in his relationships with 2 different guys. He has to weigh the pros and cons to choose between them and enjoy living life with the one true love...But I CAN'T agree he steps 2 boats with one leg.

  2. I say he's kinda selfish for now... bcos his boyfriend in KL is being cheated on.

  3. ok everyone is writing mind stimulating posts lately.. which i think is so much better than reading no brainers..

    I'm all for monogamy. I sincerely believe it's possible to NOT love/fuck with another person when you're already in a relationship.

    I guess the key is self control and respect to your partner. Not to mention respecting yourself.

  4. I think your friend fits the title of your blog very well "Love Makes You Silly" ;-D

    I guess he is walking on dangerous wire holding the balancing stick. Once fell, he may end up losing both. But then, it is his choice and he has to face all eventual consequences, if any.

    Perhaps a deeper point for him to ponder on...what is it about him that have brought him into such a situation? Encountering the type of guy that he has yearned for and actually in love with both guys are probably the sugar coat. A deeper look under the coat could unveil his real fear of loneliness, perhaps.

    Pardon me if I am being perceived to be judgmental here ;-)

  5. ur fren is damn selfish...wanna have both guys

  6. @Sky. pikey, J-boy & Darren: while I am not condoning my friend's actions nor will I condemn him. there are issues between his KL boyfriend and him which, if you guys are privy to, you might understand the situation better.

    @Ng: indeed there are deeper issues to be looked into! fair comment!

  7. Think i have to pen down my thoughts on this.

    I'm seeing this guy who is attached. Which perhaps might in turn become a relationship, who knows? Thought I would give this a shot.

    Another part of me thought.. Man, this guy I like is attached. He's cheating (if that would be the word for it) on his bf to be with me. Mind whoever, I'm just the average joe.

    And no, it's not sex we're both after.

    Think only time would tell what happens next. back again, is it possible for a person to be in love with 2? although it sounds superficial. j-boy has a valid point.

  8. Agree with Ng's said. all because of loneliness.

  9. I think everyone deserves to have a chance at who they like/love. I dont think it's wrong for the singaporean lover. As for the guy with 2 lovers, it is just like eating ice-cream. I like chocolate ice-cream and vanilla ice-cream at the same time. Can i just have both mixed tgt in one serving? Or maybe we can also relate to how malay dudes in Malaysia can have up to 4 wives. As long as they can accept and be happy with it I do not see the problem.

  10. @Bear: I also like to eat double flavored ice-cream or polygamy by Muslim. reality, it don't happen, esp when come to can't be shared, that's for sure; unless one party didn't find out...or all parties dishonor, so simply don't care..

  11. I thought stuff like this only happens in drama series.
    Lately I discovered that real life can be as dramatic. Which can be quite funny also (not referring to this situation).

  12. @Jon C: most of the time its not the sex that matters most, its the companionship that sticks ... anyway, good luck to ya!

    @nicky05: having someone close by to share is the comfort most of us will seek!

    @Bravebear: it all depends on the parties involved!

    @Sky: maybe you have not experienced a similar situation and you think it's impossible.

    @J-boy: All the world's a stage - Shakespeare. Have you not seen movies and felt like you are one of the characters? ;-)

  13. I just do not understand this position: once you are with someone then ur mind need not roam around anywhere....atleast even if it does, it should be in limits. a commitment is a commitment and one needs to respect it. If i was in his place I wud be with the KL guy for we have given to each other. And if I need to choose between the two i still wud go for the KL guy. Its a conscious decision to be standing by with someone rather than bending to blowing breeze. going for a man who has decided to be with you in all sense rather than with a perfect one.